Sunday, March 04, 2012

Amazing What a Little Information Can Do

In case you haven't heard, Don Cherry went all Dennis Miller on Brian Burke on Coach's Corner during the first intermission of Saturday's game. Here's the rant:



Here's what every normal person was thinking afterward:



However, the overwhelming voices were cheering Cherry and his delightfully xenophobic rumblings. How could the Leafs have no Ontario players on their team? How is that even possible? And why do we even care? Wait...

Cherry bobs from bitching about Burke complaining to Grapes' "bosses" over to the perils of playing anyone not from Ontario (previously, it had just been Europe and Quebec, but I guess the rest of the country and continent fall into his view now).

Apparently, Burke's Leafs have "all Americans" and "American college guys" playing for him. Yay! First stats break of the post:

The current roster features 22 players:

4 are European
8 are American
10 are Canadian

Wait...

Also, two of their "college guys" are Canadian. Just sayin'.

But what has Burke done at the Entry Draft?

Well, he's drafted 22 players overall - 3 Europeans (which would suit Don fine), 8 Americans, and 11 Canadians, which is part of the reason why the Toronto Marlies lineup looks like this:

4 Europeans
4 Americans
18 Canadians, including 9 from Ontario

Brian Burke probably does not want Don Cherry's job - his resume is pretty complete without it. People certainly listen to him without him needing a weekly television platform and daily radio platform1, but he's thus far chosen to take the high ground and not bark back.

Three of the top-10 scorers in the NHL are Ontario-born (number 5 and 6 are Phil Kessel and Joffrey Lupul, though...hmm...), two of the top-10 goalies by GAA are from Ontario (four Americans, though), and only one of the top-10 defenseman by plus-minus is Ontario-born. And let's not forget that the most talked about mushy head in the NHL belongs to a Nova Scotian.

I saw a few jokes on Twitter last night that everyone that loves Don Cherry talked about Coach's Corner for 10 minutes, and everyone that hates him talked about it for 20, so I suppose I fit into that stereotype, but I don't really care. Cherry has been crossing the crazy old man threshold for a few years now, and it's about time Canadians stopped celebrating his rah-rah patriotism so wholeheartedly and cast their eyes to some of his less admirable qualities.

Imagine Randall's grandmother as Don Cherry:



Keep on keepin' on, Brian - GM of the Toronto Maple Leafs is an often thankless job, and Don Cherry's just jealous.

1 - Don't get me started on "Grapeline"

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